The Most Painful

Every time I fell in love it was a major FAIL  :(  I was once in love but its kind of short but I'm having a hard time of the healing and moving on process since every time they broke my heart I felt like I was the ugliest, like I don't matter at all, every time I'm ignoring every single memory of them, I want to punch them on the face I want to torture them I want them to feel how it feels like you're in a hell. Its hard that every time I woke up in the middle of the night thinkin about I really want them in hell as what they did to me. I was ok then, I don't care about everything like I know I am SIMPLE not beautiful, well yeah I forgot about those things because of my mom, because of my family problems, then there you came you f**k rock my world then in just a snap you replaced me for the one who dumped you, for the one who's a gold digger because that b***h, came out of nowhere when everything's alright between you and me tried to win you back because she used that innocent child! (poor kid) you don't f****n know how you've hurt me so much and how painful it was!!! until now I can't forget about it you ruined everything, you ruined me screw that b***h!!! and screw you and F**K YOU!!! Why did you let her win this F******G game?! well, I don't really know how to say bad words because I am the kindest, yes I'm really AM until you did this to me, I know that even if you're with her I know your heart and your mind is still MINE DON'T TRAP YOURSELF THERE UNTIL ITS TOO LATE. If that F******G B****H knew how I filled your heart with joy and chances and beautiful memories the way she dumped because she value what's inside your pocket but not inside your heart she would've won but you let her and now I'm dying in pain and she's happy and you both laughing at me I just hope she knew what heart and love is it won't work out if you only knew money, gold, money, gold. and you know what the most painful is that, nobody needs me anymore, you don't need me anymore! and its hard for me to move on because I was so overwhelmed for me to know somebody would actually let me feel the happiness, beauty memories and everything in spite of what Iam going thru. I'm ok then, but now I don't know when can I be ok until I get back to myself that its ok! are you happy to see me like this that finally you hurt someone with a good heart like me!